Guiding

The next step in teaching children is guiding. Guiding is showing your child how to do something. Children learn a lot by seeing and hearing, but even more by doing. It’s kind of like teaching a child to ride a bike. They see other people doing it, we explain how to do it, and we put them on the bike and hang on while they work at getting it. In teaching things like respect, responsibility, integrity, and patience we sometimes have to “hang on” with them while they work at getting it. This is something that has to be done intentionally. Parents are generally quick to tell a child what behavior not to exhibit, but often forget to tell a child what behavior to exhibit and how to do it. Telling children not to argue lets them know that arguing is unacceptable, but it doesn’t tell them how to handle conflicts. Telling a child to be patient lets them know that patience is valued and expected, but it doesn’t tell them how to wait patiently. For a negative behavior to be stopped effectively, it must be replaced with positive behaviors.