Saturday, August 1, 2009

4 Essential Elements of Parenting [part 3]

Posted by Tracy Wainwright at 11:34 AM
Now, consistency does not mean an out-of-balance rigid style of parenting. As important as love is to applying discipline, there also needs to be some flexibility in routine and rules. A child flourishes in a loving environment with consistent boundaries and discipline, but there often occurs situations which call for adapting. For example, if your child is sick, you are probably going to relax the television and eating rules. As our children grow, we must continue to reevaluate their personality and developmental level in order to ensure that boundaries and discipline are appropriate (Holden, 1996.) The results of a 15-year-old living within the limits that were set when they were 5 are disastrous. As observant parents we need to pay attention to what is going on with our children to see if a situation calls for a different reaction. In general, whining is not tolerated in my household, but invariably it shows up increasingly when my daughter is sleepy. Although it is made clear to my daughter that whining is not acceptable, at times it’s more appropriate to talk about her feeling sleepy and how we can express ourselves better, rather than putting her in time out or taking away a prized possession immediately. The rule doesn’t change, but circumstances are taken into consideration, just as they are if your child has a bad day at school or gets hurt.

So, all we’re called to do is to love abundantly, discipline effectively, remain consistent, and be flexible, at the right times. Lest this task seem too daunting, we need to apply all of this information to the knowledge that we are not doing this job of parenting alone or without guidance. All parenting advice and recommendations should be viewed in light of scripture and what God impresses on us through his Holy Spirit as we continue to grow in our relationship with Him. He is our parent, the Ultimate Parent and models perfect parenting for us to flourish in as parents ourselves.

0 comments on "4 Essential Elements of Parenting [part 3]"

Saturday, August 1, 2009

4 Essential Elements of Parenting [part 3]

Now, consistency does not mean an out-of-balance rigid style of parenting. As important as love is to applying discipline, there also needs to be some flexibility in routine and rules. A child flourishes in a loving environment with consistent boundaries and discipline, but there often occurs situations which call for adapting. For example, if your child is sick, you are probably going to relax the television and eating rules. As our children grow, we must continue to reevaluate their personality and developmental level in order to ensure that boundaries and discipline are appropriate (Holden, 1996.) The results of a 15-year-old living within the limits that were set when they were 5 are disastrous. As observant parents we need to pay attention to what is going on with our children to see if a situation calls for a different reaction. In general, whining is not tolerated in my household, but invariably it shows up increasingly when my daughter is sleepy. Although it is made clear to my daughter that whining is not acceptable, at times it’s more appropriate to talk about her feeling sleepy and how we can express ourselves better, rather than putting her in time out or taking away a prized possession immediately. The rule doesn’t change, but circumstances are taken into consideration, just as they are if your child has a bad day at school or gets hurt.

So, all we’re called to do is to love abundantly, discipline effectively, remain consistent, and be flexible, at the right times. Lest this task seem too daunting, we need to apply all of this information to the knowledge that we are not doing this job of parenting alone or without guidance. All parenting advice and recommendations should be viewed in light of scripture and what God impresses on us through his Holy Spirit as we continue to grow in our relationship with Him. He is our parent, the Ultimate Parent and models perfect parenting for us to flourish in as parents ourselves.

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