Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Why Rewards?

Posted by Tracy Wainwright at 9:55 PM 0 comments
First, it’s important to look at the nature of our children. There are different perspectives on human nature. One theory believes that people are inherently good and are corrupted by circumstances. One believes that children are blank slates and develop according to their environment. Another believes that people are inherently evil (sinful) and need to be trained to be good. A Biblical perspective tells us that we are born with a natural inclination to sin, a result of the fall in Eden, have a unique personality that effects how we interact with our environment, and are effected by our circumstances. In essence, this means that children do not naturally lean toward righteousness, need outward motivation to do what is right, and interact with how they are parented according to their God-given personality.
Second, it’s important to recognize that God models rewards and incentives for right behavior. As we discussed in the beginning of the chapter, we talked about the importance of obedience and how God rewards obedience and punishes disobedience. The Israelite nation is given rewards in prosperity and peace when they obey God and worship Him. We are promised the reward of the fruit of the Spirit as we seek God, love, worship, and obey Him. In the parable of the talents Jesus compares the kingdom of heaven to a man who rewards his servants with added responsibility and shared happiness[U1] . Paul tells us in Romans that “in all things God works for the good of those who love him.” (8:28a) John tells us that “God’s love is truly made complete” in us when we obey God’s Word, of which being filled and complete in God through Christ is the ultimate reward. (1 John 2:5)

[U1]“His master replied ‘Well done good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!” Matthew 25:23

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Rewards

Posted by Tracy Wainwright at 9:32 AM 0 comments
Rewards, incentives, and positive given to children for motivation for children to make good choices is not just okay, it is an important part of effective parenting. There is a lot of debate these days about using incentives and rewards in parenting. Some believe that children should do what they are asked to do and should do because it’s the right thing to do. They believe that rewards for good behavior or completing tasks provide outward motivation, which is not the goal. We’ve already discussed that we want our children to mature and develop internal motivation. This is true for making right choices, as well as for things like working hard. However, as I discussed previously, our job as parents is to provide outside motivation until our children become internally motivated. If we take a step back and look at our children in a little different light, it may help us in understanding clearly what rewards, incentives, and bonuses are and why they are important.

Friday, October 3, 2008

Make It Fun

Posted by Tracy Wainwright at 4:12 PM 0 comments
It's really easy as moms to get bogged down in the day-to-day chores and keeping up with stuff. It doesn't take much to get caught up in everything we have to get done and get lost to the "stuff" of mothering. But we are supposed to enjoy being moms and our time with our children. To do this we often need to be intentional. There are often moments that will catch us off guard where we have one of those full of fun and laughter moments. But in general, to add more fun to motherhood we have to be intentional.

I'm not the most creative person in the world, but God has graced me with inspirational moments to make my journey of mommyhood more fun. One of the things I did recently was make a menu for my children for lunch. I like to give them choices for lunch, but don't want to wait a half hour while they go through the list of things I'm not going to fix or don't have. So I prepared a Wainwright Lunch Menu and treated them like guests in my restaurant. They got to eat on a blanket in the garage and love "putting in their orders." It made lunch fun and they still ate what I had and was willing to fix without any arguing.

Another thing we often do for fun is race to get the house straightened up. I don't like them to be racing against each other, so we all work together and race against the clock. I set a timer and we rush around (often with me giving step-by-step instructions) getting the house straight. It doesn't seem like as much work to them when it's a game and things go much faster!

Although everything can't be fun, it's an important tool to teach our children that we can have positive attitudes and make things enjoyable even when we don't want or don't feel like doing them. This goes a long way in experiencing life positively and learning patience. It's much more pleasant to do things and/or wait for things when we can make it more fun.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Why Rewards?

First, it’s important to look at the nature of our children. There are different perspectives on human nature. One theory believes that people are inherently good and are corrupted by circumstances. One believes that children are blank slates and develop according to their environment. Another believes that people are inherently evil (sinful) and need to be trained to be good. A Biblical perspective tells us that we are born with a natural inclination to sin, a result of the fall in Eden, have a unique personality that effects how we interact with our environment, and are effected by our circumstances. In essence, this means that children do not naturally lean toward righteousness, need outward motivation to do what is right, and interact with how they are parented according to their God-given personality.
Second, it’s important to recognize that God models rewards and incentives for right behavior. As we discussed in the beginning of the chapter, we talked about the importance of obedience and how God rewards obedience and punishes disobedience. The Israelite nation is given rewards in prosperity and peace when they obey God and worship Him. We are promised the reward of the fruit of the Spirit as we seek God, love, worship, and obey Him. In the parable of the talents Jesus compares the kingdom of heaven to a man who rewards his servants with added responsibility and shared happiness[U1] . Paul tells us in Romans that “in all things God works for the good of those who love him.” (8:28a) John tells us that “God’s love is truly made complete” in us when we obey God’s Word, of which being filled and complete in God through Christ is the ultimate reward. (1 John 2:5)

[U1]“His master replied ‘Well done good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!” Matthew 25:23

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Rewards

Rewards, incentives, and positive given to children for motivation for children to make good choices is not just okay, it is an important part of effective parenting. There is a lot of debate these days about using incentives and rewards in parenting. Some believe that children should do what they are asked to do and should do because it’s the right thing to do. They believe that rewards for good behavior or completing tasks provide outward motivation, which is not the goal. We’ve already discussed that we want our children to mature and develop internal motivation. This is true for making right choices, as well as for things like working hard. However, as I discussed previously, our job as parents is to provide outside motivation until our children become internally motivated. If we take a step back and look at our children in a little different light, it may help us in understanding clearly what rewards, incentives, and bonuses are and why they are important.

Friday, October 3, 2008

Make It Fun

It's really easy as moms to get bogged down in the day-to-day chores and keeping up with stuff. It doesn't take much to get caught up in everything we have to get done and get lost to the "stuff" of mothering. But we are supposed to enjoy being moms and our time with our children. To do this we often need to be intentional. There are often moments that will catch us off guard where we have one of those full of fun and laughter moments. But in general, to add more fun to motherhood we have to be intentional.

I'm not the most creative person in the world, but God has graced me with inspirational moments to make my journey of mommyhood more fun. One of the things I did recently was make a menu for my children for lunch. I like to give them choices for lunch, but don't want to wait a half hour while they go through the list of things I'm not going to fix or don't have. So I prepared a Wainwright Lunch Menu and treated them like guests in my restaurant. They got to eat on a blanket in the garage and love "putting in their orders." It made lunch fun and they still ate what I had and was willing to fix without any arguing.

Another thing we often do for fun is race to get the house straightened up. I don't like them to be racing against each other, so we all work together and race against the clock. I set a timer and we rush around (often with me giving step-by-step instructions) getting the house straight. It doesn't seem like as much work to them when it's a game and things go much faster!

Although everything can't be fun, it's an important tool to teach our children that we can have positive attitudes and make things enjoyable even when we don't want or don't feel like doing them. This goes a long way in experiencing life positively and learning patience. It's much more pleasant to do things and/or wait for things when we can make it more fun.
 

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